Over the past few days I have reached out to one friend in particular who I have considered a friend for a few years now. We have sat out in the country looking at stars, laughing about every subject possible, we had a burping contest (so not lady like, I know ;) ), talked about some of the deepest subjects of life...and the other night, he let me lay next to him and cry my eyes out as I told him stories of Ryan, and how sad I feel now that he's gone.
It was almost 1:30 am and there I was, tossing and turning in my bed, watching the short video I have of Ryan rapping about his stupid Kirby vacuum, going through pictures and then I came across one of him blowing me a kiss. He sent it to me while he was in New Mexico, and as if just for a tiny instant, it felt like he was still there and I was just counting down the days til I got to see him again. That made it too hard, and I knew I couldn't make it through the night on my own. I texted my friend and said "I need a friend." He replied "Here I am." So I drove to his house and we layed on the trampoline and watched stars fall from the sky. It was amazing, and I'm blushing as I write this because I kind of hope he doesn't ever read it just because I'm sure to him he was just being a good guy, but I'm not sure he'll ever know how much that meant to me. I looked like a train wreck, make up smeared my face - hair a mess, and he still told me that I was beautiful and I needed to start believing that.
Who says all men are clueless?? One of my best friends is a man and let me tell you, I'm so glad I have him in my life. He believes in me, and he trusts me just like I trust him. So...maybe he will never really understand how much he means to me, but I did come to the conclusion that as my friend I very much love him, and I pray he stays in my life because he is so encouraging to me.
Moral of today's story?: When you meet genuine friends, hold on to them -- they are rare but truly beautiful.